Subject: Re: X-Files/SEGA in general
From: [email-masked] (David Gray)
Date: Thu, 25 Dec 1997 16:35:55 -0500
Newsgroups: rec.games.pinball

In article <[email-masked]>,
[email-masked] wrote:

> The X-FILES pinball just arrived in our arcade, placed next to STAR WARS

"We're too late! It's already been here."

"Mulder, I hope you know what you're doing."

"Look, Scully, just like the other homes: Douglas fir, truncated,  mounted,
transformed into a shrine; halls decked with boughs of holly; stockings
hung by the chimney, with care."

"You really think someone's been here?"

"Someone, or something."

"Mulder, over here-it's a fruitcake."

"Don't touch it! Those things can be lethal."

"It's O.K. There's a note attached: 'Gonna find out who's naughty and  nice.'"

"It's judging them, Scully. It's making a list."

"Who? What are you talking about?"

"Ancient mythology tells of an obese humanoid entity who could travel at 
great speed in a craft powered by antlered servants. Once a year, near  the
winter solstice, this creature is said to descend from the heavens to 
reward its followers and punish disbelievers with jagged chunks of
anthracite."  "But that's legend, Mulder-a story told by parents to
frighten children.  Surely you don't believe it?"

"Something was here tonight, Scully. Check out the bite marks on this 
gingerbread man. Whatever tore through this plate of cookies was 
massive--and in a hurry."

"It left crumbs everywhere. And look, Mulder, this milk glass has been 
completely drained."

"It gorged itself, Scully. It fed without remorse."

"But why would they leave it milk and cookies?"

"Appeasement. Tonight is the Eve, and nothing can stop its wilding."

"But if this thing does exist, how did it get in? The doors and windows 
were locked. There's no sign of forced entry."

"Unless I miss my guess, it came through the fireplace."

"Wait a minute, Mulder. If you're saying some huge creature landed on the 
roof and came down this chimney, you're crazy. The flue is barely six 
inches wide. Nothing could get down there."

"But what if it could alter its shape, move in all directions at once?"

"You mean, like a bowl full of jelly?"

"Exactly. Scully, I've never told anyone this, but when I was a child my 
home was visited. I saw the creature.  It had long white shanks of fur 
surrounding its ruddy, misshapen head. Its bloated torso was red and 
white.  I'll never forget the horror. I turned away, and when I looked back
it  had somehow taken on the facial features of my father."

"Impossible."

"I know what I saw. And that night it read my mind. It brought me a Mr. 
Potato Head, Scully. It knew that I wanted a Mr. Potato Head!"

"I'm sorry, Mulder, but you're asking me to disregard the laws of  physics.
You want me to believe in some supernatural being who soars across the
skies and brings gifts to good little girls and boys. Listen to what you're
saying. Do you understand the repercussions? If this gets out, they'll
close the X-files."

"Scully, listen to me: It knows when you're sleeping. It knows when  you're
awake."

"But we have no proof."

"Last year, on this exact date, SETI radio telescopes detected bogeys in 
the airspace over twenty-seven states. The White House ordered a Condition 
Red."

"But that was a meteor shower."

"Officially. Two days ago, eight prized Scandinavian reindeer vanished 
from the National Zoo, in
Washington, D.C. Nobody-not even the zookeeper-was  told about it. The
government doesn't want people to know about Project  Kringle. They fear
that if this thing is proved to exist the public will  stop spending half
its annual income in a holiday shopping frenzy.  Retail  markets will
collapse. Scully, they cannot let the world believe this  creature lives.
There's too much at stake. They'll do whatever it takes  to insure another
silent night."

"Mulder, I-"

"Sh-h-h. Do you hear what I hear?"

"On the roof. It sounds like ... a clatter."

"The truth is up there. Let's see what's the matter..."

May you one and all have a Merry Christmas.

                  From snow covered Iowa........

                  Keep those bumpers 'poppin,

                                            David Gray

It is a little known fact that pinball machines operate on smoke.  If all
of the smoke leaks out they invariably cease to work properly.